when service feels frazzling

Am I the only one who can get worked up into a panic about serving God?

I wonder if I’ve whizzed by some obscured path that God really intended for me to take. I worry about whether or not I’m doing exactly what I should be doing at this very moment and I wonder if I am doing it well enough.

Please tell me I’m not the only one?!

The seconds of uncertainty consume me – did I say the right thing here, do the right thing there? So many options of what to do over the next 15 minutes, what am I supposed to do?

I become frazzled by the specifics of serving God. I don’t want to miss His plan.

But God isn’t a task master, He is a Father.

I think of my own children and wonder if some of the thoughts I have toward them are a hint of His thoughts toward me.

If my child willingly and joyfully served me by, let’s say, cleaning the bathroom, whoa! I would be thrilled! Or they sweep the floor, or pull some weeds, or mow the lawn, or vacuum, or comfort a younger sibling, or …… you get the idea.

Wouldn’t any of us parents practically throw a parade for our child who joyfully served us or someone else? And we certainly wouldn’t look down on them judgmentally or with displeasure because they scrubbed the kitchen floor instead of washing the car. Their joyful overflow of love paired with any action would be praiseworthy to the extreme.

What if my relationship with my children reflects the heart of God more than does a micro-managing mid-level supervisor?

Maybe God is not so concerned with the what as He is with the how.  

It’s not about the task, its about the motivation.

I may be preaching to myself here, but I imagine there are some of you who understand what I’m talking about.

God is not an exacting boss, but a generous gift giver who delights in our efforts to bring Him glory. He delights in our love for Him that works itself out in joyful service – no matter what it looks like.

My frazzle is self-fed fear of rejection and disapproval.

I’m learning to let Love in and let fear out. Remembering He is Father, not task-master. Cherishing His care rather than vainly attempting to earn what I already possess in Him.

What peace comes from serving like a child of God!

They Forgot

“The sons of Ephraim were archers equipped with bows, yet they turned back in the day of battle. They did not keep the covenant of God and refused to walk in His law; they forgot His deeds and His miracles that He had shown them.” Psalm 78:9-11

I so often excuse myself as ill-equipped or unprepared. But the truth of the matter is that I am equipped yet failing to enter the battle; failing to remember Who already won the battle. If Peter is right, that “His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by his own glory and excellence,” then we have no excuse. If I feel ill-equipped and unprepared it’s because I’m a spiritual amnesiac – just like the sons of Ephraim who forgot the deeds and miracles of God. When we exchange worldly, fallen, and perverted knowledge for the true knowledge of Christ, we become like those who turned their backs in battle. We walk in sin and disobedience rather than in victory and in the Spirit.

Lord, help me to remember!

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:12 

A Little Bit of White

We had yet another snow day here in the Willamette Valley. Most years go by without any, but this year we’ve had five. It’s fun for now, but I’m not sure the kids are going to be so excited when they have to make up the days at the end of the school year….

But they had fun anyway. Neighbor friends came over and all the girls built snowmen.

img_2055

While the boys made faces….

img_2065

I hadn’t pulled out my real camera in quite some time (usually just use the iPhone these days), so I decided it was time. I captured Ruth and Charis having some fun.

img_2076img_2073

But it made my day when the usually reclusive Lydia actually posed for me!

img_2069img_2089img_2081

It was a fun day, but I’m glad the girls are back in school today 😉

For the sake of…

Psalm 143:11

“For the sake of Your name, O Lord, revive me.”

How many times have I prayed for God’s help and intervention for the sake of my own comfort and ease? Like David, I often cry out to God and at times, like David, it feels as though God has turned His face away (v. 7). Yet rarely do I consider God’s perspective as David did.

David recognized that as one loved by God, he was a testimony of God’s character to the nation of Israel and its neighbors. Eyes were watching how God dealt with him. So David appeals to God for the sake of God’s reputation among the people. David had a perspective that went beyond his own concerns. He perceived God’s concerns – namely, His glory.

Our prayers shine a light on the true motivations of our hearts.

Lord,

Help me to seek after You and Your glory, even in the midst of trial and difficulty. This life is about Your glory, not mine. If You see fit to bring glory to Yourself through my trials, so be it. May my heart’s motivation be to bring You glory, not my own comfort and ease.

Becoming

“Praise the Lord! For it is good to sing praises to our God; For it is pleasant and praise is becoming.” (Psalm 174:1)

“Love… does not act unbecomingly.” (I Corinthians 13:4&5)

I want to be becoming – inwardly beautiful with outward manifestations.

Is this it, then? Is this Eureka? Is this the linchpin of inward beauty? Of becoming?

Praise?

Perhaps it is the act of praise that becomes love toward God and helps us become who He always intended us to be. Praise is our maturing, our growing up into Christ who is the Head. Praise is our renewing of the mind and putting on the mind of Christ. Praise is our acknowledgement of God in all our ways, trusting His direction. Praise leads to worship, love, trust, dependence, enjoyment, thankfulness, humility, obedience, service.

Praise is becoming.